Being a parent is tough!
Raising tiny little humans who have to do and learn so many things each and every single day is a lot of work!
We are PARENTS, we’re not superheroes!
We get mad, we get stressed, we get EXHAUSTED!!
Do you know what goes hand in hand with parenting?? If you haven’t guessed it already, it’s WINE!!
Wine is the perfect ending to that terrible day where your kids were out to get you. It’s the perfect way to unwind and forget about the 30 times you had to tell them the same thing and it still never got done!
Here’s 10 reasons why parents DESERVE that glass of wine at the end of the night:
1. Kids ask for so much!
Seriously, how many times can they ask the same question over and over and over? “Can I have some water, Can I have some water? Mom, Can I have some water?” (when I am not cleaning up the dog puke, yes). “Where are my shoes? Did you see my shoes? The dog must have took my shoe again!!” (I don’t know, where did you put them), “Can I have a snack?” (No, we are having dinner in five minutes), “Please can I just have a snack? One snack?!” (NO).
2. Kids NEVER stop fighting!
Oh goodness, I’m sure you’ve seen that meme on Facebook with the scene from Jurassic World with the three dinosaurs and comparing it to raising children… THAT IS NOT A JOKE. It’s serious. That truthfully is what raising kids is like. Our three kids, NEVER STOP FIGHTING. “Oaklee is looking at me weird!”, “Kinsley was acting like my mom!”, “Peyton is on my swing!”, “He/She/They are being mean to me again!” Seriously. When we were kids we worked it out on our own. Stop fighting, and if you’re not going to stop then at least quit telling me about it!!!!!!!!!!!
3. Kids hide shit.
Do you know how many collective hours I’ve spent looking for the freaking remote after bedtime? HUNDREDS of hours!!! Those little brats think of that dang remote as “theirs” and hide it from their siblings… and apparently also their mother. Last time it was lost (yesterday), I spent a good TWO HOURS looking for that darn thing and guess where it was……. IN THE FRIDGE. WHY? WHAT? HOW?! Needless to say there are NO screen time privileges today!
4. Kids are DISGUSTING.
If you are a parent… here’s a word of warning. Don’t EVER look at your door frames in your house. Don’t EVER buy a black light for your bathroom (I doubt those glowing spots are coming from your husband). Don’t even question what’s on their shoes or that weird smell coming from their room. Just don’t. Those kids leave their grimey little handprints on EVERYTHING. There’s not enough time in the world to clean up the path of destruction that they leave!
Ohhhh on the topic of disgusting things, WHY DON’T THEY EVER WANT TO WASH THEIR HANDS?! Why are they always STICKY?!
5. Kids have the worst timing.
As a work-at-home mom, I have things to do…. AT HOME…. when they are obviously there. I have phone calls to make, people to email, and live videos to do. I always have this great plan of action that I will sit the kids down before I have to do something important and give them something QUIET and messy that will keep them busy. THAT NEVER WORKS. They can be little, tiny, gorgeous angels for all of five minutes…. until that phone rings or I sit down to start my work. Then all hell breaks loose! They are screaming, they are crying, they are asking for snacks (AGAIN), they are climbing on my lap (covered with their sticky hands) pulling my face towards them until I give them my undivided attention. They don’t care there’s work to be done.
6. Kids see a clean house as a challenge.
Most nights before bed (while I am drinking that glass of wine that I so desperately needed), I clean the house. I do all the dishes. I sweep, mop, do the laundry, pick up their toys, and then I get to RELAX. The next morning I wake up and it doesn’t even take those little brats 15 minutes to have the whole house in shambles!!!!!!!!!!!! They get playdoh out, mix it with water and get it all over the house (in the time it takes me to brush my teeth—Mind you I haven’t even had time to get any COFFEE)!!! They pour (and spill) insane amounts of cereal and milk… that never gets eaten. They unfold all the freaking clothes that I so neatly washed and put out for them the night before. They are outside and then back inside before I even have a chance to put a bra on….and hence my clean house is screwed.. and I am exhausted before 9 am.
7. Grounding kids is more of a hassle for the parent then it is for them.
I am HORRIBLE with the follow through of grounding- “You’re grounded from screen time ALL DAY tomorrow”, “You’re not having dessert for the rest of the weekend”, “You are not going to the neighbor’s to play tomorrow”……. All of those are awesome threats… but the follow through is HELL. Do I really want to entertain three insane children for 12+ hours with no screen time, no way to bribe them to eat their dinner, or no single break for mom ALL DAY LONG?! Ummm no. Grounding them is more punishment for ME!! Oh yes, and don’t forget what happens if only one kid is grounded from something. Sure, two of the kids can play on the Kindle, but now I get to listen to the other one pout, scream and ask “WHYYYYYY” 40 bazillion times. It’s a joke. Good parenting is a joke. Sure, take the screen time. You were much better today, so forget what I said yesterday.
<chug, chug, chug> Are you still there? Do you want some wine yet?
8. Kids are always whining!!
Don’t kids have a normal voice?! Do you know how many times a day I have to “nicely” remind my kids to use their “big kid voice”? I don’t want to hear you WHINE. Whine=Wine.
9. Kids are mean and they don’t even know it!
“Yes, it is normal for Mommy’s legs to jiggle when she walks” , “Yes, I know that I have a double chin when I look at my phone”, “Lot’s of Mommy’s butts don’t fit in the swing”. Kids don’t have a filter.
10. Kids are EXHAUSTING.
It’s finally the end of the day! You’ve made it through all of the fighting, screaming, whining, mean comments, messes, constant questions, educational activities, hugs, kisses, snuggles and DRAMA, and those sweet little angels are finally asleep (after the 14th time coming out of their room for water, a bedtime snack, an extra hug). Let’s face it, YOU ARE EXHAUSTED. It’s time for some YOU time… You time with some wine!
Kids are hard work! There’s absolutely no shame in putting those rascals to bed and grabbing that sweet glass of wine!
Feel free to turn on Netflix or just sit…. in utter and complete SILENCE. You deserve it!
Happy Wine Wednesday!